Tea Zee Pea

A couple of days back I watched TZP and I have a few things to say about this film particularly when I am seeing that people at large are loving it.

It has a very sentimental/sad touch thoughout, no doubt about that – I almost cried twice. But if I have to talk about the film as a whole, then I have a few things to say but before that, I would like you to read what Aamir Khan had to say about Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s Black (You can read it here in the article called 'Thanks for the drubbing on my smoking'). To give a one line summary, he said that he was totally against the idea of children being treated harshly. Period.

Before I set out to write what I want to write, I desire to accept a few things:

1) I like Aamir Khan as an artist – I think he has been a part of great films like Lagaan, RDB etc (barring Fanaa as his latest disaster).
2) I don’t particularly like Bhansali’s films because he tries to make everything very out of the world – dream sets, beautiful faces, gaudy clothes, picture perfect locations – all this makes his films gross and vulgar. To reason this out, I would like to talk of Devdas for instance, written by Sarat Chandra Chattopadhyay, it was a story based on the pre independence days – the houses, clothes, the place where Chandramukhi lived etc were not even close to how Bhansali made it look. Another example form the same film is when Devdas hit Paro before her wedding night, Paro’s face bore a scar which run through her face – but no, in the film, Ash of course would not allow herself to have a scar which will make her look any less beautiful :). Now, getting to examples from Black – look at the place where Rani stays, the college she goes to – everything is so picturesque, so beautiful. I think Bhansali sets out with a good script and then messes it up using the Yashraj’s / Karan Johar’s lavishness without understanding its need. However, I would like to point that I did like Black – the story, because I think it was quite real.

Let us now come to the point I want to make.

Aamir Khan shows a dyslexic child who is regular in all other aspects other than his impaired reading abilities – he has shown that the child responds to the environment, most often like it is expected, and based on that, he tries to justify that people should be soft and sensitive towards the differently-abled kids. Which I totally agree should to be the appropriate behavior. But that is not how most mentally challenged kids are (please excuse me for using this term, because I personally feel that they are no less than any of us who proudly call ourselves normal – in fact I think they are far superior to most of us reading this blog – and I say this not out of something I have read or have seen on screen, but out of experience of interacting with them.). Going back to the point, these kids most often come with a physical disability in addition to the mental disability – this makes them not very conventionally pleasing in appearance and conduct. Now with this reality biting, let us go back to this film, and see what Aamir has to offer.

Talking of Black, what Bhansali started out was that there is a girl who does not respond, who is violent, who does not have the ability to speak, or eat or do things the way children of her age do. She is distinctly and unpleasantly different. Her tired and desperate parents have tried hard to educate her by getting her different teachers, but all of them run away because the child is so unmanageable – and then comes this new teacher (played by Amitabh Bacchan) who takes the responsibility of making her confident enough to face the world. And so there are various incidents where we see that people are behaving very harshly with the girl -- which per me may not be the morally correct thing to do, but it is real. In my view, thats where the difference lies – there is something like a appropriate and morally correct behavior and then there is something like natural/reflexive behavior. Now the question is what should be shown in a film?

People who come to watch films try to find respite by seeing that at least somewhere, things are right and fairy tale’ish’. They feel reassured and rejuvenated by believing that there are places where there is goodness all around and people live happily ever after.

A story (I am purposely not using the word Movie) like black is not a fairy tale. It shows an inconvenient truth, and no one likes to witness the reality so much on the face. It makes them uneasy and dissolutions their concept of a happy and fair world making them uncomfortable and unhappy. And so they take moral high grounds and chose to reject the reality.

My idea of a good film is when the director is able to capture what is real rather than trying to show what is correct. Most of us know what is right and wrong. We don’t want to see a rosy rosy picture, and moreover, I think that is no better way of teaching someone the right, other than by showing how dark the wrong appears.

TZP shows us what is right. Apart from that I was also unhappy that he did not dare to work with the more complex cases (the kind of people you think of when you hear the word mentally challenged).

Having watched TZP, one gets the feeling that yeah, that is the way of life – that is how we should behave – but who is there to show us the mirror? Who will show the reflexive behavior that the attitude of people in large have towards the mentally retarded (sorry for this term again, but I am just trying to express the seriousness of the entire issue) – I strongly feel that it is important to show what happens in reality so that people know where they wrong. I think that this is a more effective mode of sending the message across.

To close, I would like to share what Sudhir Mishra wrote in one of his articles “I personally think that most film makers in India are children and most films in India are childrens’ film and rather bad childrens’ films. Their notion of love is that of a fourteen year old. In all popular entertainment the notion of life is going retarded. It’s an illusion which you make people buy into and you get rather hurt when they realize life is not like that. There’s very little difference between selling a fake notion of life and selling a fake product. It’s like advertising. You fall in love and you live happily ever after, is as stupid a notion as you use a fairness cream and you become fair. All are very idiotic notions, sold to the naive and people make a lot of money out of that.”

A Saturday well spent..

Me and a couple of friends went to this school where we often visit to spend time with the lovely children there.

So to say they are differntly abled kids but you need to be with them to feel how beautiful each one of them is. For certain they are really special.

This time we had a small christmas party there - games, singing, dancing, eating and loving ..

A few pictures..

Mayank tying a shiny ball on the christmas tree.



Singing christmas carols :)



The youngest princess there :)



Then the antakshari session, trust me they are sooo good at it



We lost and the losing team had to dance



A group picture



B-bye time

Saviour Bug!

Yahoo messenger has a bug (I think it is!), you can add yourself as a friend in your friend list and then chat with none other than yourself..

It is a good time pass.. Just imagine, if you could get someone who looks, feels and perceives things exactly the way you do.. I wish I could give flesh and blood to it..

Thats it!

When do you really feel that it is enough? What happens - the desire ends or you just get tired?

the chit chat place..

Free will?

Was reading up a few things on freedom and then I wondered how free we really are? Come to think of it, we can’t choose to be foolish, we can’t choose our sexual preferences, we cant choose a profession of our choice are a few amongst the many other 'we cant's'.

How can the state tell an individual to change his/her profession because it is not dignified enough? Like in Mumbai Dance bars were made to shut down, because the state supposedly wanted to protect the dignity of women, but then what about the women who were in it because that was there source of income, their job and they did that out of will.

Why penalize someone for not wearing a seat belt or helmet? I don't advocate the vice but then a person does have the right to be stupid when the consequences are nothing more than self inflicting.

It makes sense to have laws to ensure that there is peace and order in a free society -- but these must essentially be restrained to victim oriented behavior, like murder or rape for instance. But not on things like homosexuality, or suicides or prostitution.

Free will just remains another word in the dictionary.

Phew!!

Often I wonder if automation is a boon or a bane. Is it more tension than convenience?

For instance, the credit card – it is a good enough tool to lead you to a fatal debt loop.

It is so difficult to control your spending habits if you get used to the credit card concept, like I am.

Not just the way you spend, but it also becomes a huge task to manage the bills, verify them – check for service charge, late payment fee etc etc, keep track of the last date of payment et all.

And unluckily, if you do have a discrepancy, then the nerve raking pain to go thru the viciousness of the call centre world!

Today, I was making an airline booking for Delhi thru this website called ezeego1.co.in, after the payment was thru I awaited the ticket to be displayed on the screen but all that I get is a blank page with nothing on it except a message reading ‘Your payment is successful!!” – Then began the ordeal of calling up customer support – and hours of waiting – finally they say that due to technical failures, the tickets have not been booked, but the credit card has been charged. Now they will arrange to revert the charges – and no it won’t happen immediately, it will take a couple of days and I need to check back after 3 working days – remember the vicious circle!! And I always wonder why servers’ crash and technical failures happen just after the money has been charged! I think I will never get an answer to this.

Sadly today I also had a long haggling session with the customer care of ABN AMRO Credit card people for some over limit charge they levied on my credit card (I was 100 Rs over limit and they charged me 500Rs more for that!!) – and only when I threatened to surrender my credit card did they agree to reverse the charges!! See, no one wants you to spend less – what a trap this is.

I remember long time back I was using my ATM card to withdraw money and after the transaction, the money did not dispense from the wending machine plus it gobbled my card and to add to the fun, it threw out a slip which said ‘TRANSACTION SUCCESSFULL’!!!

Sometimes I feel like giving up all the plastic cards I have and return to the good old paper money – but it is so difficult to break free from this habit which sometimes does make life easier.

PS. I got a funny gift today, my office reception lady called me to collect a parcel that had come thru courier post, and guess what it was, a pair of pink socks and silver colored chappals!! :)

Whacky day!!

Forcast

Happened to see my forcast for today .. on orkut .. It says:

"You will have a very comfortable old age."

The forcast that I read before this ..one..

Phew!!

My new maroon shoes :)

Holy Cows make the best Ham burgers - Mark Twain

Came across this article written by Annie Zaidi about growing up as an Indian Muslim.

No! I will not put a title!

Running a bad mood and the only thing that cheered me up was a share-my-lunch invite from a buddy -- menu -- chole and rotis -- yummmmm..

Thinking of going for the karaoke night today at Aura -- Ahh.. I feel better ;)

Alot happened in Rajdhani

Went home to attend a friends wedding AND to be there with my little bro on his birthday AND to meet my family, cant really say which was the greater reason.
Must admit that the stay was quite eventful –

Friday: The very first day I slashed my thumb badly with a knife and then went ahead with attending a big fat punju sagan (a pre wedding function) – although the reporting time on the card was 7.30 pm, but no cookies for guessing that even when we arrived at 8.30 pm, there was no one – not even the caterers :).
Saturday: Started my day with a visit to Max hospital in Noida to dress my injured blue thumb, met a friend for lunch and then took him to Max hospital Saket to mend his bleeding chin – yes the same brand of hospital twice!! Then met up with another friend and spend some good time.
Sunday: Attended the REALLY BIG FAT punju wedding and was ehm ehm bored :( shhhhhhhh… (my friend will kill me for saying this). Slept in the car on my way back home.
Monday: My brothers birthday – Got up really late – he had already left for school!! And I thought I came with an intension of making it a little special for him Huh.. – I could not even wake up on time! During the day I helped my mum fry pooris for the feast my parents arrange for the less fortunate children at least once a year (this year, it happened to be on my brothers birthday), and then just before my bro was supposed to get back from school, i dozed off. Slept all thru the day till it was late evening and my mom woke me up to cut the little cake my dad got for my bro (yes, my Dad got a cake -- i was surprised since it was very unlike of him. When we were young he used to never do all that, in fact I could not imagine him saying anything more than a little happy birthday.. Looks like he has changed a little).
Tuesday: Bad Bad day – full tension - mat hi batau to accha hai.
Wednesday: Damage repair day – success rate was fair.
Thursday: Took an early, really early morning flight back to Mumbai. (No, I did not do that to report to work on time, but because that was the only cheap flight available - well i should say relatively cheap -- the wedding season has peaked the ticket prices so much that I felt that I am buying a ticket for a trip to the moon!!)

Now - the icing to the cake - just after I got back to Mumbai, I was told that the my dad's laptop crashed today (and I was the last one to use it – that too last night!!). What more?? He had gigs and gigs of important data in it, AND my dad is 62 yrs old AND he is a professor, AND I was the last person to use the machine– I hope you can imagine what is happening.

Murphy’s Law: People never take back up of important data. And the data which is useless is never damaged or lost!!

The last resort to save my ass: I have suggested my dad to send the laptop to a recovery agent -- have kept my fingers crossed till I hear from him :(

Okay, now to end this post on a happy note let me tell you about the good stuff that happened in Delhi-

I met and spent some good time with 4 of my very close friends.
I attended the wedding -- this saves me from being subjected to a life long complain of not attending the wedding :)
Was with my bro after a long time on his birthday (although I did not really do anything major -- I slept all day instead .. bad sister :()
Spent a little time with mom, and even lesser time with dad -- but it was good -- we did not have any argument ;)

A few pictures:

Bitch! Uh!! Thanks!

A couple of days back, I was reading something about slangs and why most often they outrage the modesty of women. But that is not what I want to talk about here. I read a very interesting take on the word ‘Bitch’ about which I would want to write.

When does a man call a women Bitch? It is when a woman refuses to be treated like a doormat and does not settle for anything less than the privileges offered to men. So when ‘Bitch’ is used as an insult to a woman, you could assume that she is a woman who has opinions and does not shy away from talking about them, she is the type who believes in the concept of ‘a tooth for a tooth, an eye for an eye’ – who refuses to sit back, get embarrassed and smile uneasily when being offended or bothered.

So, it basically boils down to the fact that being bold, outspoken and sensibly extrovert is being a bitch.

And if someone calls you one, then you could just take that as a compliment and say Thanks!

7 days old

..Without

I was thinking why people get restless? Maybe it is because they have a desire which is unfulfilled or incomplete.

Then i came to think of the very clichéd question of what is it that I cant live without. And knocking off illegal answers like Books/Music/Food/Water/Air/Sleep and the likes.. I roughly figured out that it is 'Touch' that I can not do without.

By touch I mean that the virtual feeling of being loved or loving is not enough - I need presence just as much. I need to feel love and affection under my fingertips.

I don’t know if I am being juvenile in saying this. I am totally aware of truths like - "The one who looks outside dreams, and the one who looks inside awakens", but till the time I dont reach to a level where I can honestly say that I need nothing, not even myself, I would want to believe that it is Touch for me.

Chichi

It is difficult to take pictures of animals because they invariably move exactly when you hit the shutter. But at the same time, it is very rare to land up with a displeasing image. This one is Archie. A handsome 3 and a half year old golden lab.

Outlook and Deb -- A subtle relation

Was reading an article in the recent copy of Outlook about 12 reasons for India to feel happy about – trust me it is a must read – a good booster shot after the virtually perennial lowly feeling arising out of the atrocities that we see everyday (I will try to get the link for the article). Outlook has off late become one of my regulars (maybe because I subscribed to the lucrative promotional corporate offer they were providing a couple of months back - but whatever may be the reason, I am happy about it) – there is a certain sense of honestly and simplicity in it. I was pleasantly surprised to know that the editor of the magazine, Vinod Mehta was also at one time the editor of Debonair. :)

Chak diya India ne....

The results of a recent survey conducted by Durex on sexual behavior of people all over the world was announced a few weeks ago, and guess what we came out with flying colors.

The report says “Urban Indians have one of the most exciting sex life in the world and are also the most open lovers in the world when it comes to talking to partners about sex. Almost three-quarters (74 per cent) of Indians surveyed are comfortable with telling their partners what they like in bed way above the global average of 58 per cent and the UK with just 49 per cent”

Considering the fact that India has by large a sexually repressed culture, where openly talking of sex, sex before marriage, sex without the intention of procreation etc is a sharamnaak baat (shameful), it is interesting to find results like this.

“The survey further points out that two-third of Indians (68 per cent) think their love lives are exciting, a sharp contrast with 38 per cent for English lovers and 36 per cent for famed lovers in France. Moreover, 63 per cent of Indians say they have enough variety, compared with 47 per cent in the UK and just 9 per cent in Japan.”
Wow. Why not, after all we belong to the land of the Kamasutra and Khajuraho temples.

“Fidelity is still something that Indians are proud of, shows the survey which said that Indians have had fewer sexual partners than most other countries. Indian men have averaged six lovers and women have averaged two, while in the UK the figures are 16 and 10 respectively. Globally men, on average, have 13 partners and women have seven.”

Don’t want to comment on the fidelity factor, but yes, I am not very sure how correct these figures are. Looking at the people around me (in the software industry, for all those who don’t know where I earn my bread from), I think the average value is exaggerated. I mean there sure are people here as well who have helped maintain those averages, but I think there is this one set of people with more than six partners (>>6) and there are this other set suffering the single partner syndrome (by pressure or purpose – mostly by pressure – the lack of being able to make a choice or being lucky ;)).

Jo bhi hai, India ne chak dia, ek baar phir. Its ‘V’ for Victory, or shall I say it is ‘F’ .

Sex sells, and so does cricket

Yesterday I was reading an article in the Indian Express about the hunger strike announced by leading hockey players to protest against the ‘step-motherly’ treatment meted out to them by the country at large.

While the country is rejoicing and celebrating the success of the Indian cricket team on bringing home the T20 world cup, and the state and various other associations are scrambling in to announce awards and rewards for the men in blue, there are other equally deserving sportspersons who are feeling left out. And I really don’t blame them.

For the sake of argument, let us talk about the national hockey players.

Not many know that recently they won the Asia Cup. So we see that there is hardly any 'name'/publicity of their success. Let us now check out where they rank at the 'fame' chart. Getting straight to the figures, each cricketer got Rs. 80 lakh from BCCI, an apartment worth Rs. 25 lakh from Sahara, and amounts varying from Rs. 5 lakh – Rs. 1 crore and a Porsche 911 from the state and/or BCCI as a token appreciation for their performance, and unlimited air travel for the players, their families and the entire team, courtesy Air India and Indian Airlines. In contrast, the hokey players were rewarded with a comparatively meager amount by the IHF, an amount as low as Rs. 1 lakh.

I have two issues here. 1) There is no doubt that the cricketers did a marvelous job, but don’t other players who bring laurels to the nation deserve comparative treatment and appreciation? And,
2) The prize money offered to cricketers is obscene. Think about it. India is a country where money needs to be carefully and humanely spent. On one hand there are thousands who sleep hungry, who don’t have a shed to sleep under, no clothes to wear and in the same country the state is contributing to the already ridiculous disparity between the rich and the poor by doing this. I mean come to think of it, just one game and each of the players got richer by at least a crore of rupees and a house! And lower/middle and upper middle class working sector people slog for 40-50 years and maybe don’t even earn as much as these men do by winning just one match. Unfair. Totally.

I am not against or jealous if at all you think I am sounding that way, I am just unhappy to learn this. I also understand that there are some areas like sports that has a lot of money in it – but then one should be just – how can hockey / badminton / billiards not be as respectable as cricket. I think it is about the popularity. People like cricket in India so it is paid well. People like Golf/Soccer/Tennis in the west, so those sport stars are well paid.

Essentially if you want to be rich, either you should be born rich or, you better do what the janta wants you to do.

Ek saal baad ...

25th September 2006, I reached Mumbai. It has been a year since then. I won’t say that I never felt time ticking by. There were days of all kinds - some too fast and some too slow, but yes, yesterday when it occurred to me that it has been a year of living ‘alone’, well yes, it did look quick.

Yesterday I told a friend about the first anniversary, and he suggested that I write about it. I thought it was a good idea, but now when I am beginning to write, I don’t know what to write. Shall I talk about the changes in my life over the last one year – but then I thought who will be interested to know that? Shall I write about Bombay and living alone – then I wondered if it is of any significance. So I have finally decided to write a bit of everything – the way I always do – random thoughts of an insane mind.

This is not the first time I have been away from home (I have been in a hostel in a college in Bangalore for 4yrs), but this is the first time that I am staying all by myself in an apartment fending for myself. I would like to say that Mumbai is a place for singles. I think it has a lot to offer. First and foremost, Mumbai is safe. It is safe for a woman to take an auto ride as late as 1 or 2 am. For most women in Delhi or now even Bangalore, this is a distant dream. Mumbai is forever busy – it is truly a city which never sleeps. You will find people of all ages in public places – the beach, restaurants, pubs, coffee shops, joggers parks at all times. I have also noticed that the concept of taking leisure/fitness walks in joggers parks or by the beach is common here. People here are more liberal – at least in most parts of Mumbai – maybe because they are too busy in their own lives that they do not bother much.

A very dear friend, tuples, once shared that he has noticed that cities which have a port generally have open societies and have a mix of cultures – because it is a port, interestingly, Bombay fits in that rule. But I wonder how Chennai is like. I haven’t stayed there but neither have I heard great stuff about that place – at least I have heard that it is not a place for north Indians. I however am not a part of the popular South Indian – North Indian rivalry. I could somehow never relate to it. Not that I have never been treated disrespectfully by the locals of Bangalore. Apart from facing a couple of atrocities arising truly out of communal hatred, I have never conceived other incidents to be rising out of favoritisms. And I believe we should come out of this Tit for Tat business, after all reforms and social work begins from home. Coming back to the issue of displaying favoritisms, in Mumbai, it has not even happened once – in fact I have seen people are kind towards people from other cities. I remember, I had once got into a no entry lane (I did not know I was doing that for I did not notice any sign which said it was a one way), when the traffic cops stopped me and although they conned me of 100 bucks, but were very polite with me – especially after checking out my DL which was issued in Delhi. The golden rule "Goodness in return of goodness" taught by our elders when we were young, kind of works here most of the time. The success rate here is higher is all I want to say :)

Coming to the people, in Mumbai you can wear whatever you wish to and travel relatively safer in a Public transport. In this respect, Bangalore and Delhi are equally bad. In Bangalore the culture is not too open and they have distinctly different styles, for instance, girls wear a bindi even if they are wearing a totally western outfit like a trouser or a pair of jeans. In Mumbai you can wear string tops, halter necks, short skirts .. anything you feel like and you are quite safe. I realized that it is safe to move around like this particularly when I saw other women wear these kinds of outfits and traveling in the very essential local trains.

Another remarkable thing that I noticed about the people in Mumbai which is contrary to people of other cities, is the way men behave with women. Not once but many a times, when I could not manage to squeeze my way into a ladies compartment and had to force myself into a general compartment, I have noticed that the men are very courteous towards women. They make sure you are not sandwiched between them and they try their best to make space for you – had it been Delhi, I am sure the men would try to fall on top of you and leave no opportunity to make some body contact.

Mumbai is nice, except for its never ending rains, killing traffic and travel time issues. I must admit that it is a big put off – the roads, the pot holes, the unruly traffic, the unclean surroundings, the very less civic sense in people, the ‘make as much money as you can’ attitude (which is comparable to delhi), the obscene disparity between the rich and the poor.. But then again nothing is perfect.

Living alone has taught me a lot as I keep saying. Form my childhood I wanted to do things for the less fortunate. As a child I saw my mother do a lot of social service thru Deepanwita (the trust formed in memory of my lovely sister), and I used to keep helping her off and on. But never did I do anything by myself. Staying alone and angel eyes (an initiative of a few compassionate and responsible individuals in TechM), helped me get a start. And since December last year, there has been no looking back. There is a different kind of peace and happiness when you can make someone smile, even it were for a moment. There is no comparison what so ever.

Have already talked of what it is like on a personal front to be in solitude, so wont talk of it again.

Last year when I decided to move out of Delhi, I did not know how long I would stay in Mumbai, in fact I thought I would be back in a year’s time. It’s been a year now, and I have no plans of going back. Anyway, as Bryan Adams best selling album was called, it has been ’So far so good’.

I forget, Do you?

I have noticed it many times, I forget. Not everything, but reasons - reasons which cause deep sorrow, anger or pleasure. Surprisingly, I dont forget faces, but I forget names; I dont forget the gist of what I see / read but I forget the intricacies, I dont forget the hurt but I forget the incident. I find myself often looking like a completely unreasonable fool because I blank out exactly when I need to speak.

AIM Carborised Matches!

Was using an AIM matchstick when i noticed this written on the box:

"Any man who laughs at women's clothes has never paid the bill for them"

Phew!! Quite interesting to find this on a matchbox!! And imagine, I read it !!

Its normal!

I am getting sooo bored lately that I went into "Chutti kab hogi" mode. Checked the time, fuck 10 more minutes to go and that munna bhai song started playing in my head 'Pal pal pal pal ... kaise katega har pal..' .. I minimized all active windows on my desktop and sat staring blankly at my workstation and just then i noticed - I have the same wall paper on my PC every single day of the month (which is set by the Administration dept of our office - which I cant change) and I am doing the same kind of work everyday. Hardly have any interesting people around. Think about it. Anyone would be bored with this. This discovery doesnt really make things interesting however, its interesting to know that I am totally normal :|. Sigh.. Stagnation!!

Yes, I am still alive!!!

I have been so lazy offlate and it is pissing me bigtime. Off to the gym right after I post this.

Life is a box of Chocolates..

.. you just dont know what you will get - Tom Hanks in Forrest Gump.

Aurangabad calling..

Sometimes weird things happen - like for instance today.

I keep my cell phones ringer in the beep mode when at office. I particularly detest loud and blaring ring tones - especially the ones which plays some song or extreamly elaborate robotic noises. Even more when people leave their phone behind at their desks and the phones start ringing with on one to answer or disconnect - very much in assertion to one of the murphy's laws.

Anyway, I always wander off from the topic -- I always do that - almost in all my posts you will find a last line which says, I forgot what I had set out to write. See, again I am wavering :D.

Okay, coming back (Oops now this i.e. 'Coming Back' is a nice book by Edoardo Albinati on the rehabilitation of the refugees of Afganisthan -- see, I again deviated from the topic -- this is exactly what I mean when I say that I always sway away from a topic – reminds me of a friend who does that too – irritating it is. Ufff.. I am irritating each one of you now :) ). Okay, another attempt to strictly talk about the unusual incident.

I missed a call (courtesy the excessively low volume of the already faint beep tone) from a number I had never seen before. I generally don’t return calls which I have missed if they are from unknown numbers. But this one was different -- the digits and their sequence, gave me a strange feeling of familiarity. So, I thought of calling back. Tring Tring...

A little kid answered the phone. I told her that I got a call from this number - asked her who she was and if she knew anyone in Mumbai. She politely said No, and that she might have dialed it by mistake. She said sorry. She said her name was Amr'u'ta and she was from Aurangabad. She sounded cute. I smiled 'Its ok'.

After about half an hour, I was taking a walk outside my office building sipping chai, when my phone beeped again. It was the same number. I answered the call. It was her. She said, "Mein aapko batana chahti hu ki mujhe aapki aawaz bohot achhi lagi." ( – English translation: ‘I wanted to tell you that I liked your voice.’) I was surprised and smiling. Suddenly went back to my school days when I used to get 'crank' calls where boys used to say things like "Kya aap mujhse freindship karengi?" -- in the typical Dillite tone. I pinched myself back and there she was still on the phone expecting a response.

I was confused - I said 'Thank you beta. Tumhe meri aawaz achi lagi uske liye thank you, par tumhare mummy daddy ko jab pata lagega ki tum STD calls kar rahi ho, to woh tumhe daatenge.' Just then she said 'Nahi nahi, maine apni mummy ko bola aapke baare mein - ki mujhe aapki aawaz acchi lagi - to mummy ne mujhe kaha ki mein aapko bata du'. Me surprised the second time. I chuckled like an embarrassed teenager. Then broke into a short conversation. She asked me if I was working and I asked her what she did -- 9th grade she proudly exclaimed, I wished her all the best and said thanks again. And hung up.

I might never hear from her again - I might even forget this incident, nevertheless, it felt nice. It felt nice because of many things: 1. I liked the confidence the child had. 2. It was good to know and hope that other children her age are as free as her, when it comes to expressing ones feelings. and of course, 3. I got a compliment from some one and some place I had no links with.

Funny world. You just never know what’s coming up.

Shakti-wo-maan

Logged into the popular networking site, yeah you guessed it right, orkut and I suddenly noticed this:

Today's fortune: You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems

Made me feel so fauladi and … emm .. macho (I request all feminists to excuse me for not finding a feminine word to match ‘macho’) but then I thought -- Duh!! What a fortune!

Does life like give us a choice? Either you have to choose to run away and get what you hate or, deal with it - try your hand on it hoping that maybe this time luck will shine on you and things wont be as fucking as it was last time, or you will be as lucky as last time.

Mudde ki baat yeh hai, for all you people who don’t understand hindi, what I just wrote meant, The bottom line (not the bottom actually) is, that if I do have a choice to avoid a problem (even if it is an easy problem), I will obviously chicken out -- And, if they are difficult problems, phew, who wants them!!!. By the way by avoiding a problem, I meant that avoiding it wont get me into a yuckier situation.

Hai Aag Yeh

.. par kahan??

The reviews are so terrible that it urges me to watch the film. Check out more on it here.

Spooky?

A couple of colleagues said that this picture looks spooky while i dont think that same. What say you?

I am a dreamer..

"Perhaps it is good to have a beautiful mind, but an even greater gift is to discover a beautiful heart." ~ from the motion picture, A Beautiful Mind

Fair World?

Yesterday I was browsing thru a couple of news channels when this one picture caught my eye and I just froze. Channel: Times Now. Location: Bhagalpur, Bihar. Description: A man being brutally beaten up by a mob for good half an hour and later tied up with a police bike and dragged by the cops while world around him just watches. Crime: Tried to snatch a chain.

I was so terrified to see the pain and humility the man was made to go through. I was disgusted to watch the people flocking around him urging other to join, I was sad to see the media and the police being a part of this brutality. I was also shameful to be a part of the same world…..

I was wondering how the news channel had the audacity to record the entire event without trying to stop the barbaric act. I agree it is important to bring these things out in the open, but the better way could have been that a team of reporters (considering that even they feel that it was wrong) could genuinely try to stop this savage act while another team could record the event for the awakening of the nation. Is it always a question of TRP’s?

That man did something wrong by stealing, but why cant one see that no one becomes a criminal by choice. This 20 year boy is an orphan; he has a young sister and is the only bread earner in the family. He is a cart puller by profession -- I am sure it is not difficult for us to guess how much dignity and money his work offers him. Is it so difficult to understand that he is already poor, frustrated and depressed -- he needs money and it is not surprising that he is urged to steal. Not that I am saying it’s okay to steal, but it is important to see the bigger picture. Without any thinking we go any buy clothes which may never wear, we go to fancy places and eat royal meals, we go for weekend outings and spend hundreds of bucks – hardly do we realize that there are some people like the Bhagalpur victim who perhaps earn less than what we just spent in one day.

I feel bad when people honk like crazy at hand rickshaw pullers – most of them painfully old having weak hands, thin legs wearing torn clothes with sweat dripping from their pale faces - struggling to pull the load behind them in busy roads. I have seen many people doing that -- people sitting in t he comfort of their luxury AC car, feeling irritated about what the boss had to say about their work, about the state of the roads, about the low increments, about not getting the promised phone call from a loved one...

Why are people forgetting to spread the love? When the world around us need to be cared for and needs us to be compassionate, all that we are doing is getting into a rat race of winning our space, even if it requires us to crush others around us. The lessons of sharing and of helping others taught to us when we were children have long been forgotten or worse even, practiced selectively.

Why is the world becoming uncivilized? Why is it so difficult for people to stand up against wrong doings? Why doesn’t our heart ache to see cruelty around? And why can’t we take a step forward to stop these wild acts? Why is it that we think that 'It is none of my business' when it comes to protecting and suddenly 'everything becomes my business' if we are participating in a wrong doing or something which directly affects us?

The problem is the also the abject poverty prevailing in the country. There is a huge gap between the rich and the poor. The problem here is also the corruption. I read in the papers a couple of days back about the 800 some crore Rupees grant that the government had announced for the poor in Orissa -- According to the scheme, atleast 75 days of employment per year was promised to be provided to one member of every family in 7/10 villages in Orissa, but that of course did not happen. The progress report said that some 700 crore Rupees had already been spent and 55 days of work were provided to the people, but investigation by independent and politically uninfluenced people showed that the families were not even given 5 days of employment and that too not every family was fortunate to avail this scheme. The employments cards were fraudulent; all records were fallacious and fake. An estimated 200 crores were spent and the rest 500 crores were pocketed by immoral and unethical officials - the civil servants who are supposed to work for the people - who have pledged to take India forward.

Solitude and Forlornness

It has been almost a year since I am staying alone and I would want to write about how it feels to be alone and independent.

Freedom is the first thing that comes to my mind when I think of people who live by themselves. I know many people who stay away from their families, but I don’t know too many people who are totally living ‘alone’ -- by that I mean, I know people who live with friends or their lovers (in shared apartments) but I have met very few people who are really staying with no one but themselves. It is not same. Even if you try to argue that it is and I am sure all people staying ‘alone’ will assert it. It’s not as easy as it looks from outside. Freedom comes with a price - doing the household chores - cleaning, cooking, keeping the house neat, buying stuff for the house, paying the bills, paying the newspaper man, the cable guy, disposing the garbage and the list goes on. It doesn’t sound difficult does it? But trust me it is not easy. I am not complaining at all, because I love staying by myself -- I love doing things for the place I stay. It’s nice to come back home when you feel like and go to the gym or take a nice shower. Make yourself some coffee and sit by the window pane -- enjoying some music or thinking or doing anything that you feel like, for instance roaming around naked in the house – that is what I call total freedom.

But then, sometimes the solitude gets to you. Sometimes you don’t want to come home to an empty space. Sometimes you feel too tired to cook. Sometimes you crave to eat something that you mum cooks the best and you cant even make it half as tasty, sometimes you feel sick and if you need a glass of water to take a medicine, you have to move your ass to get it for yourself, when you wake up all untuned because of a bad dream, you find no one around you to comfort you - we are humans - we all need some human touch -- some assurance that we are cared for and that we are not alone. There is a difference between being alone and being lonely.

I have many friends, a lot of activities to indulge in (which I do), many things to look forward to, many things that can easily keep be busy -- but then there are times when you feel the emptiness.

Yesterday a friend who is one of the very few people staying 'alone' sent me an sms saying "If you stay alone you tend to speak to yourself a lot." Correct -- Now the intellectuals would spring up justifying why it is nice and important to speak to the self. I agree. BUT, when you speak to yourself most of the time because you don’t really have a choice (for whatever reasons - you may be too bored to talk to anyone, or you may not find the right person, or any other thing..), that is the time when it becomes not so nice and not so positive. In fact, it makes you feel lonely and left out. You feel lost. And when you try looking into the future and see that there is going to be no change -- nothing better and nothing worse that will happen, then it gets frustrating. No one likes stagnation and doldrums -- something should happen be it good or bad -- It gives you a sense of being alive. Please don’t take the liberty of trivializing this by calling it "self inflicting sadness/injury" because it is not as simple as it looks. I must admit that even these huffishness don’t last too long -- because none of us want to be sad -- it gets hidden behind something else and then re emerge some other time.

Staying alone however teaches you a lot of things -- just like bad relationships, bad experiences etc.. It teaches you the value of a cooked meal, of finding washed and ironed clothes when you are out from a bath, it teaches you the importance of someone handing out a glass of hot water to you when you are unable to sleep because of a sore throat, it tells you the importance of money, it teaches you the importance of having a person with whom you can discuss the news while having a meal....

Anyway, I don’t really know if I made any sense to anyone and if I could convey what I had set out to write. Its time i should leave for home. My house is waiting for me.

Deepanwita

She was 16 then and would have been 28 now.

24th August!

Giving a title everytime I post sucks bigtime!!!!! I am feeling sleepy. Woke up at 7 in the morning. Made myself some Oats and rushed to the gym. Burnt some calories and rushed back home. Caught some glimpses of the headlines in the newspaper -- Gosh, Sanjay Dutt looks so worn out -- with the half grey beard and bald head and tired eyes.. I also noticed the shackles tied around his wrist. Anyway, he sure is luckier because of his celebrity status. Anyway, after that I went in for a quick shower and rushed my way thru terrible traffic and reached office at 10.30. And still I don’t seem to get over the drowsiness. Oh! The good news is that ever since I resumed my gym (it has been 7 days of continuous mehnat) I have lost 600gms :). Ok. Don’t laugh. It does matter to me. :P Today someone told me about Aamir Khans blog, and I read it -- its nice. You can see it via the AK Blogging link on the 'Recommended' section. Tomorrow i have the Hi-Tech (special children school) visit. We have planned a clay modeling activity for them. I have feelings that it should be nice as usual. Fuck! I am still yawning away to glory. I was all sad and low in the morning. Was actually missing my people – my mum and others. My gym instructor Avinash also noticed it. He came to ask me if everything was fine. Many people have said that my face is very transparent -- it tells exactly what I am feeling inside. Just a couple of minutes back I was thinking of a Great Dain that lives in my block and that’s when I thought of my sweetheart - Archie. That cute doggie of mine :). Dogs have a strong sense of hmm.. of everything. Archie doesn’t like any sadness. He doesn’t like to see anyone crying. If you cry in front of him with your hand over your face, he will shove his face to yours and manage to move your hand off your cheeks and then snuggle up close to you. Yes! he is that lovable and caring. I am missing Archie. Sniff sniff :(

Lion.. The king of the jungle. Big Deal !!

Check this out. You will know what I am talking of. Its hilarious :)

Thats what I call power :)

Leopards mate 70-100 times a day and that too for 7 days at a stretch. :) Unbelievable ?? Check this out. .. Now can anyone beat that :)

This Bulb

For all those people who thought they could hardly do something for our planet, check this out.

Small Pleasures

I am promoting the group blog 'Small Pleasures' in this post. A couple of wonderful people have got together and are writing about things that make them smile and gives the engine of their lives the much needed choke start. (If you remember cars of the bygone years, they had this knob which says 'Choke' which was needed to start the engine in cold days. I guess they still have this concept in chilly places.). Anyway, do visit the blog and drop me a mail if you want to be a part of it too :).

Buddha

Nikkon - D200

Saving the best for last?

Today I was speaking to someone and there was a funny problem. Let us not discuss the problem; nevertheless, I want to talk of a story which I had read long time back when I was a teenager.

Okay, the story goes like this. One day a man gets his girlfriend a present, it was a set of pretty satin undergarments and an expensive perfume. But as soon as the she got the gift, she packed it up and put it in the closet to use later – on a perfect and special occasion.
Days passed by, and one day the woman died an untimely death. Just as the man was going thru her things, he found the gift box that he had once gave her – it still had those things which she liked but could never use just because she was waiting for the right time.

I learnt from that story.

Its raining cats and dogs in Mumbai

I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
~ Alfred Tennyson

Holocaust – The Final Solution

Holocaust – comes from the Greek word: "holos" (completely) and "kaustos" (burned sacrificial offering), but I don’t intend the same meaning now. It is far more horrifying than this.
Just before the onset of World War – II history witnessed the largest gruesome mass genocide. I am talking of the destruction of the large Jew population along with gypsies, homosexuals, Soviet POWs, and prisoners of all nationalities.

Train loads of unaware innocent people were brought to concentration camps. Unaware of their destiny, these people were told that they were being taken for a disinfecting bath and in turn were streamed into large gas chambers where they were killed in a matter of a couple of minutes. This is not all, there are many more atrocious evildoings that the Nazi’s inflicted upon them.

I had been to one such evil place during my recent trip to Europe – Auschwitz concentration camp in the outskirts of Krakow - the old capital of Poland.

From the heart of Krakow, we took a local transport bus to Oshwiecim, which is the polish town where the Auschwitz camps were located. When I saw it from a distance, it looked like red brick factory houses rowed in a vast barren land. Till that time I did not know what was in store inside.

When I walked inside the iron gates of the premises, I could already sense a strange sadness in the air. Everything there appeared still and lifeless. Gravel sand pathways were there with black notice boards indicating what is what. I wish I could publish a couple of the notices here on the blog, but I don’t yet have the pictures with me.

There are somewhere around 14 blocks in the area. Each block had an evil story to tell. Children, women, the aged, the diseased – everyone was subjected to an unbelievable level of torture – so much that dying seemed to have been a better alternative. To site some of the horrendous tortures, there were doctors who used to perform medical experiments of unimaginable horror on men, women and children. One such cruel doctor was Dr. Josef Mengele. Starting from experiments like performing operations and dissections without administrating anesthesia, to injecting chemicals into the eye of children in an attempt to change their color, to stitching twins together back to back just like Siamese twins and leaving the wound unprotected. There is a record which says that the mother of two such unfortunate children could not tolerate seeing her kids cry in pain and to free her children from this suffering, she stole some morphine from the clinic and killed them by over dosing them. The thought itself runs chills down my spine – it is so difficult to imagine the pains of the people trapped in the cruel place and punished for nothing that they had done. And to add to the cruelty, all this was done by first pampering the little children with candies and clothes. Can you imagine that the ignorant children used to happily shout ‘Uncle Mengele’ when they used to see him coming towards them with candies and goodies.. Unknown of what this undeserving uncle would do with them, they used to go with him in his personal car or in cars labeled with Red Cross to his death laboratory in Block 10 of Auschwitz and get subjected to dreadful treatments. You must be thinking that these scientists must have been crazy psychopaths, but this is not true either, there are reports which say – “….. Josef Mengele and the other camp doctors - masterminds of the horrors of Holocaust - were found to be psychologically normal. They were men of fine standing, cultured, husbands who morning and night kissed their wives, fathers who tucked their children into bed ...” .

That’s not all, there used to be roll call sessions of the inmates which would last for days and the people were not allowed to move for the entire duration – many people supposedly died during this wait. People who tried to escape were subjected to torture along with his/her entire family in the courtyards – so that no one else dared to run away.

There is a room in one of the blocks which have a whole dump of the personal belongings of the inmates. Things like toothbrushes, combs, feeding bottles, shoes – they are heaped there and they yell back at us asking us of their fault. Why did they have to meet a destiny as terrifying as that.

After WW1 in 1920, Adolf Hitler joined the National Socialist German Workers Party known as the Nazis. He called for all the Germans from all over Europe to unite and form a strong central government and fight for the cancellation of the Versailles Treaty. He reserved the brunt of his vituperation for the Jews, whom he portrayed as responsible for all of the problems and evils of the world, particularly democracy, Communism, and internationalism, as well as Germany's defeat in the War(WW1). Jews were the German nation's true enemy, he wrote. As such, they were not a race, but an anti-race. His hatred of the Jews was always known, but it took this ugly face soon after he empowered Austria. And from 1933 onwards, till about early 1940’s around a total of 6 million Jews, Gypsies, Blacks, Homosexuals, Communists and others were killed. Once a population of a couple of millions, the number of Jews have been reduced to a couple of thousands.

If you are thinking that this is something of the past and not being done now, then think again. Similar treatment is being levied onto people of Baghdad, Afghanistan, Iraq and other Middle East countries by none other than American troops. Saddam was labeled as cruel, look at what better America is doing. In fact it is shameful and surprising that how America is engaging itself in terrorist activity under the veil of reform and purification. All of this is really happening and how easily we pass judgments about wrong and right and who deserves what. A couple of days back I had a discussion with a couple of my colleagues and I was surprised to see that they are moving with the masses without exercising their ability to think and love. Without even having to face a personal attack they have such strong views about a community. Studies show that out of the entire community population, only 5% of its people are involved in extremist activities, and we should understand this and not penalize the rest of the 95% of the population because of them. Its important to remember that what we give reflects and comes back to us.

For long I thought why is there so much of hatred in the hearts of people. How do people gather enough courage to kill the innocent? Today, 3 out of 100 accused in the 1993 Mumbai Blasts have been announced a death sentence. The 7 serial blasts in Mumbai which took almost a thousand innocent lives and unaccounted loss of property and livelihood, was it all worth it? Why is it that terror spreaders justify their evil doing as a cause of something else? Was the Babri Masjid demolition worth the aftermaths it had caused? People can’t understand the value of life and keep looking for a reason to hate one another. It is so difficult to break free from the bonds of hatred? Is it so difficult to love? Someone needs to stop. And it is not a shame to be the first one to take the little step of brotherhood.

Perspective

As a teenager, I remember doing this exercise at a summer camp in which the team was shown a picture (a geometrical design) and were asked to share what they thought it could be. Alongside is the picture that was given to us. And I remember imagining this to be : 1. An poached egg . 2. A top view of a dancing girl :) and.. 3) An eclipse and 4) A tyre.. .. You tell me, what comes to your mind..

Mausam

Yeah I had planned to write about auschwitz . But right now I don’t feel like :) .. In fact I feel like talking of good things -- :) The weather is really nice this evening :) .. Feel like taking a walk in the lonely roads of IIT Powai and taking the little trek to the hill there.. taking deep breaths while watching Mumbai from the height. I desire to feel the wind touch my face make its way thru my hair :) .. And if i can get a little floaty floaty with you know what .. :) .. The thought itself is making me feel nice..

Auschwitz

I want to desparately write about this place called auschwitz in Poland.. Have alot in mind.. Maybe by next week, i will be able to find some time for this ..

Tallest and Shortest

I am sure, you know one. The other one is called Kitti's hog-nosed bat. Doesnt really look cute but how much can actually fit in 1.2 inches :)

Wonderful animated film

This is an animation film showing how Italy, inspite of being a part of the European Union, is dictinctly different from the rest of Europe. I have not been to Italy ever .. maybe I would have liked the place :)

Look who is listening :)

Europe and Me

Ever since I was half way through my recent vacation (well, only if I can call it a real one), I had this desperate urge to blog, i was literally wishing if i could lay my hands on a computer .. And when I did get one in Slovenia, I hired it for 3 Euros for a half an hour slot, and by time I finished checking all my emails, the session timed out.

I travelled from south Europe to the central Europe moving towards the west and finally to the European island (UK). And if I have to sum my feedback in one word, I would just like to say that it is 'Bland'.

At first sight Europe looks beautiful, particularly the country side. I was staying in the bay region of Slovenia and that place looked as if a scene from Cinderella had suddenly come alive -- beautiful small wooden houses with bright flowers peeping out from the balconies.. Trees all around, wooden benches scattered in plenty, little ponds with sparkling water, wine yards and the soft sunshine. Completely picturesque. I was there for 3 days. I would say, I liked the place. Then I moved north to Wien (Vienna, Austria), was not in the center of the city -- slow moving traffic, curvaceous buildings all around -- all huge crème n gold colored, the city center square, Mozart statues every where, busy people walking around in haste -- and then is when I realized that I am not liking where I was. I was thinking that that the place could be beautiful, clean with a great infra structure and connectivity, clean roads, everything in place, the law and order seemed perfect but then there was something so obviously missing. It appeared so unnatural and plastic to me. Who would want to be in a place where you need to wait for the traffic light to turn green so that you could cross the road even when you see that there is no sign of any running engine -- everything is so mechanical -- there were cycles securely parked for the public to use -- but the catch is that all you see is a box which would ask you to swipe your credit card, but no one to explain the terms and conditions -- I might sound like a 70 yr old person who is still skeptical about using an ATM to draw cash, but that is where we come from.. Let’s face it, a man less gas station (petrol pump, as we call it here), is not something I am comfortable about. Getting into the tube (metro) / bus / tram and paying thru the funny looking machines there.. I just think that it’s not just about the mechanical style of living which had put me off, it was may be also my rigidness and resistance to change and the people who I felt did not radiate warmth.

Just like its not enough to have four walls and a ceiling to make a home, same way, a well maintained infrastructure is not enough to make a city beautiful – I think the most important entity of a city is its people – and I was not happy being there.. I may be wrong, because you may argue that I might not have met too many people or, I did not stay long enough, but then I do believe that a place filled with compassion radiates energy and I was thinking about how Indians would react to foreigners, per me, I think most of the Indians are nice to outsiders (Indians as well as foreigners), we can see that even when we move within the country (for instance when I moved from Delhi to Bangalore or, Delhi to Mumbai). There was a young man I met in the bus on my way to UK from Belgium. The bus driver was a hilarious man – I was rolling laughing at the remarks he kept making on the speaker off and on.. Ok, coming to the point, we were stopped just before we were about to enter the English Channel for the immigration check & visa stamping. The driver warned us against the French guys saying that they were difficult and he advised us to ‘hug them, kiss them and if required, sleep with them’ to get through the interview and baggage check with less hassles :). So we (all the passengers) were kind of ready for a nightmare, and we queued up in the rectangular room like they show how prisoners of jail wait for grub. The man in front was the same person I was talking of a little while back. He was from Albania, and as expected, the French police was acting nasty to him – then was my turn, and the I was treated the same was, bombarded with questions, one of them asked where in UK was I going, and I said ‘Northolt in MiddleSex’, he asked me to repeat Middlesex some 4 times -- he asked me to do that while the 3 other cops sat there giggling -- i thought it was cheap humor, then he made me open all my baggage and checked the luggage really well -- just like they show in movies(I wish the Indian cops could do half of what they do..).. Anyway, the matter of fact is that we (my family) and that Albanian were the only people who did not belong to France/ Brussels/ UK and who were interviewed the longest and whose luggage was raped. The Albanian fellow told us that the French hated Albanians. And so seemed to be true for Indians and the Africans.
The same kind of thing happened when I was on my way to Krakow (Poland) from Vienna (Austria) by Euro Rail. The polish cops came with an Alsatian dog who went around sniffing us (the dog was wearing a jacket which read ‘Narcotic Detection’). This was not all, the same team (the same polish cop and the same dog) came knocking violently at our train cabin door at around 3am in the morning and repeated the checks -- re checked our passports and of course the dog did his job!! If you look at it, the security is great but then why was this happening only with outsiders, and why did this have to happen twice? I wonder if cops here behave the same way.

Apart from all this, I would also want to talk about my uncle who stays in UK. My uncle and his wife had moved to London 40 year back with a vision of giving a good life to their children and also to themselves. Now when I look at them, I feel sad. Both their children are grown ups (38 yrs old and 27 yr old) – they are staying separate and come to see their aging and ill parents only when their parents call them and if by co incidence they have time. Of course it was not bluntly put that way to me – but that was very apparent in the way that they behave with their children. They are all alone – hardly any social life, both of them have retired from work and are not in good health, but have got so used to that place that they cant even break free from the arrangement. They kept talking of how nice they feel there and how comfortable it is to stay in a high tech place like theirs, but in all their conversations I could just sense a strange effort by which they are convincing, justifying, condoling and reassuring themselves that they are in a good position and that they are happy. My Aunty almost treats herself like a British and that bugged me a couple of times – especially when she went around complaining about India and when she asked me things like ‘Do you have English style toilets in India – a W.C to be precise..’ .. I mean what the fuck.. What does she think about India!! Not that she hasn’t been here ever since she left, in fact if I am not mistaken, I think she was in India last year itself. Imagine, if Indian still hold this view about India, why should we complain and feel bad when people of other nationalities still think of India to be a land of snake charmers, black magic, bullock carts and over crowded matadors.

It is sad that people are unaware that India is advancing, it is witnessing a growth of 8.6% in its last years GDP and for this quarter the rate is 9.4%. India and china would soon be a superpower. Studies prove that by 2020, there will be 3 superpowers in the world, 1. US, 2. China and 3.India. Even today India is no less than any other place in the world. Considering the constraints of its size, population and history (India being under British rule), India is advancing at a high rate. Even today, India is the place where there are the maximum numbers of people who can speak English; India is the place where multi nationals come to get specialized as well as unspecialized labor. The mall concept, high tech flyovers, underground metro, state of the art airports.. Just about everything is being developed. The problem of India is in the reform state – it is the penetration of these amenities to the whole of India is a matter of concern and that is where we are lacking – and this is primarily because of the numbers and the after affects of what the british colonization did to us. But by talking about this the NRI’s, Indians or even outsiders are doing no help. Especially the affluent NRI’s, they are escaping their duty as Indians for getting a more comfortable life for themselves and then sitting over drinks and coffee and acting like concerned Indians.

I am actually a little lost now – wonder what I had set out to write. Will just end this with a happy note by writing about the attribute I liked the best. At a party I met a couple of learned men and got an opportunity to speak to them (actually it was a world congress of IPMA) and there were a couple of things I observed, a) Indians are much smarter than Europeans (I guess to Americans as well). b) Even Europeans happily accept, joke and fear a blond woman behind wheels  and, c) The Europeans are quite direct and open while conversing – Imagine there was this French man with whom I was talking, and towards the end of the conversation, he asked me if he could kiss me (don’t start having ideas, it was just a peck on the cheek)..

So, by what Buddha says, there are three ways of learning – 1) By reading, 2) By Listening and 3) By experience. And he has also stated that the most supreme way of learning by the third method. So, you may want to visit these places yourself and see how you feel about it. Actually maybe my perception of the place also reflects the kind of person I am and so your views may be distinctly different from mine.. But then again who says we have to think alike!

Wo-men

I was reading this book called “The Second Sex” by great feminist Simone de Beauvoir and I was surprised to know that learned people like Aristotle had said that : "The female is a female by virtue of a certain lack of qualities; we should regard the female nature as afflicted with a natural defectiveness."

I wonder how these people managed to get respect and acceptance in the society by large. Aristotle seems like such a big misogyny. Yuk !!

Men with like views should be made to live in isolation or for that matter in an island of only men – and then maybe they would know what is it about being a woman – that its not merely about a uterus – there is a larger picture.

On second thoughts, if I really sit to dramatize this entire thing, i would like to say a couple of things, did anyone notice that even in English, 'Wo' had been prefixed with 'man' to get 'Woman' :).. Sounds Clichéd and duh!! Hmm.. Not that any of these learned and wise men are saying some great things :D. And the other equally duh thing i want to say is (actually i read this somewhere): "First Nature thought of creating its biggest wonder, then he created man. Later he looked at it again and said he could do a better job, and then he created Woman" :) .. What pleasure it gives me <|:D.

Before men make comments like this on women, I guess are unaware of the essence a woman holds within herself. More surprising is the fact that there are so many women who take this thoughtless and absurd judgment about them.



Read this article below, made me damn angry::

The Inferior Sex
In ancient Greece, Aristotle expounded on the "natural inferiority" of women in all spheres of activity. "The female is a female by virtue of a certain lack of qualities," he wrote. "We should regard female nature as afflicted with a natural defectiveness."[16]

The Renaissance in England -- an era when women reigned as queens -- was characterized by a spate of diatribes which employed the concept of female inferiority as a foundation for castigating the "unnatural" and "monstrous" phenomenon of the female ruler. Political reformer John Knox's The First Blast of the Trumpet Against the Monstrous Regiment of Women (1558) was a "declaration of the imperfections of women, of their natural weakness and inordinate appetites." A sampling of its many degrading references include: "the inferior member," "weak, frail, impatient, feeble, and foolish," "in her greatest perfection woman was created to be subject to man" and "all woman is commanded to serve, to be in humility and subjection."[17]

During the same period in English history, the acceptance of female inadequacy served as a basis for the subordination of women in the marital relationship. From 1562 onwards, the British Crown directed that The Homily on Marriage be read in church. This statement portrayed the woman as "a weak creature" who was "prone to all weak affectations and dispositions of mind, more than men be."[18] In 1619, a guide to proper conduct in marriage offered the following advice to wives: "Set this down with thyself: mine husband is my superior, my Better; he hath authority and rule over me; nature hath given it to him . . . . God hath given it to him."[19]

The notorious Marquis de Sade, who in the second half of the eighteenth century terrorized and brutalized scores of female victims to satisfy his insatiable appetite for violent and degrading sex, resorted to the most demeaning terminology when referring to women. He called woman "a puny creature, always inferior to man, infinitely less attractive than he, less ingenious, less wise, constructed in a disgusting manner entirely opposite to what is capable of pleasing a man, to what is able to delight him."[20] This imagery dominated his perceptions and constituted a major factor in motivating his abominable behavior.

Various authors, thinkers, and philosophers are found in the forefront of endowing the vocabulary of female inadequacy with considerable respectability. Joseph Addison, a prominent English author during the latter 1600s and early 1700s, thought women "incapable of logic and not amenable to reason."[21] The phrases "no sense of justice," "defective in the powers of reasoning and deliberation," "that undersized, narrow-shouldered, broad-hipped, and short-legged race" and "the unaesthetic sex" comprise just some of the many derogatory characterizations of women in German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer's "Essay on Women" (1851).[22] These views led him to the conclusion that "they [women] form the sexus sequior -- the second sex, inferior in every respect to the first" and are "by nature meant to obey."[23]

A milestone in the relentless war of words against women came in the work of another German philosopher, Otto Weininger. His Sex and Character (1906) represents one of the most extreme defamations of female character ever published: On imagination -- "women are devoid of imagination." On memory -- "A being whose memory is very slight, and who can recall only in the most imperfect fashion." On morality -- "with regard to women we can talk only of the non-moral, of the complete absence of a moral sense." On genius -- "the female must be described as absolutely without the quality of genius . . . . A female genius is a contradiction in terms." On thinking--"a woman is without logic . . . The absolute female, then, is devoid not only of the logical rules, but of the functions of making concepts and judgments which depend on them."[24]

Weininger's assaults on female capability knew no boundaries: "However degraded a man may be, he is immeasurably above the most superior woman." As the result of a "long analysis," Weininger asserted: "There is no exception to the complete absence in women of any true, inalienable relation to worth."[25]

Listening??

What do I have to do to get your attenton ?

Take out an ad in the newspaper??

Is'nt it Ironic

The darkest hour of the night is just before the dawn breaks, but then sometimes the sun just forgets to rise.

Just when you think you are safe, you get hurt in places where you least expect to.

Is funny but its true that we hardly know the road on which we travel everyday.

It’s ironic that when you acquire that one thing that you craved for since a long time, you don’t need it anymore.

It happens so often that you never find what you are looking for in the most probable places.

Though unfortunate, but the person you madly love doesn’t love you back.

You just almost always fall short by just an inch.

In spite of knowing that the most precious of relations can not be defined, we spoil the beauty of it by trying to name it.

Is it not incorrect to expect life to be simple when we ourselves can’t help but let our heads behave the way it does – completely absurdly complex..

“A No Smoking sign, on your cigarette break.” : )