Watercolors

From here and there

My cutest one :-)

NNN - one of my favs from Tate 

View from the work desk

Solo cooking .. 

Matilda the musical

Apples from aunts garden

Che 'ish'

Dad, looking his profession .. A professor. 

Pretty Cambridge 

Season of high necks

Cuz

Strange mulled wine

Sis in laws birthday drink

Coolest juke box 

Friends :-)

Red girl

Uk glimpses....

Series on Ballerinas .. In Progress ..

Fish

Maybe I am anti woman

I was suggested to read a book titled 'the female eunuch' written by Germaine Greer by a male friend who calls himself an ardent feminist.

Even though I have reservations about the word 'feminist' because that often itself creates a devide and distinction of a female from the other forms of existence, I reluctantly decided to read the book since I trust the politics of the referrer.

It is undeniable that historically, and for that matter even mythologicaly women have been pushed back and thought to be less capable when compared to men. They have been taught that their sole purpose in life is to look pretty, be tolerant and support and nurture a family. All of this and it's associated negative issues and the corresponding male psyche is understood and quite rightly must be condemned. But there has to be a logic to what should change to let women be treated as a regular human being (please note that I am not saying 'treated as a man' -- to me there should be no difference between a man and a woman -- we are human beings first and we should be treated with fairness).

Greer in her book writes about how conventional beauty of hour glass figure, hairless body, long tresses and shiny skin is defined solely for women which resulted in inferiority complex, inequality between people of the same sex and ofcourse a market for corsets, makeup, diets, beauty products etc. All of this is true, but does this mean that appealing male physique, competition among men and male products don't exist? Where did words like six pack abs, tall-dark-handsome etc come from? Are there no tuxedos to match a plunging neckline lacy gown? Doesn't conventional male good looks involve cropped hair, close shave, good smelling aftershave, a dark suit and polished leather shoes? Don't short men secretly wish to be taller the same way a woman with small breasts wish for larger ones? One may have a problem with the definition of conventional good looks -- but taking it to a level where one says that the pressure of looking 'nice' is only on women and is therefore 'anti-woman' is in my view taking the real issue of actual inequality and subjugation a bit too far and off focus.

She goes on to hint women to give up bras because they are anti women - really? I feel comfortable wearing a brassier. It helps giving support to my breasts when I walk fast or run around.. It's like saying underwear is anti man! She has also made remarks which means that one is not liberal enough if the thought of tasting ones own menstrual blood is unpleasant. While I agree that customs have said that a women is 'unclean' during her periods and should refrain from performing any 'holy' activities, which I think is incorrect and demeaning and should be refused and resisted. However the choice that some women make to refrain from intercourse is their personal choice. And the women who make that choice are not anti women themselves. They still love their bodies and their existence. They just don't feel like sex that time. How is this anti women?

I am a firm believer that there should be no activity and no work that a man can and a woman can't do  purely based on gender differences.

I cringe when men treat women differently - think of them to be any less than themselves. Similarly I also cringe when staunch feminists bring up every little, almost insignificant and sometimes irrelevant behaviour up and talk about women oppression. When I read a book or talk to someone who is learned I would like to know about solutions, changes that I can make to make the world fair -- especially when I am a woman myself, I would want to be treated with respect, equality and fairness.

Will my giving up bras, or my wearing shapeless clothes or my giving up my addiction to kohl enforce my pride in being a woman? If yes, I am ready to do it.

But in my eyes these things are more to do about the sexuality, choice and liking of a person and possibly a way to promote the consumerist behaviour and fuel large corporations.

I have just read one fourth of the book, and my friend insisted that I read the full book before I engage in a dialogue. Correct he may be, but I really had to get it out of my head because what I have read so far is fucking my head up. What I have read is making me believe that I am fueling the disparity and injustice myself by desiring a fit body and firm skin and nice teeth and smart clothes... with whatever limited intelligence clubbed with my experience, life and the fact that i am a woman, though Greer is mostly factually correct, is still fatally critical.

Will finish the book and write again.

An evening in London

National Art Gallery, London

Trafalgar Square

London Eye

Big Ben and London Eye from Victoria Bridge

Houses of Parliament and Big Ben

Merry Go Round at SouthBank

Don't just talk, ACT.

In the wake of this unfortunate Delhi Gang Rape incident, which has once again brought us face to face with the harsh reality of the mentality of people at large and India in particular, we cannot and should not just fret and get angry and discuss amongst people like ourselves who anyway disapprove of what is happening. Instead, we really need to do something about it. Saying this, I have an idea. 

Most people think education can help address this issue.. but I beg to differ. Education alone has no role to play in changing the way people think. I remember being interviewed for 'Teach India' initiative by TOI, and I remember telling the interviewer that just learning Sciences and History and Literature is not going to make any person a truly progressive and positively contributing person. Instead what India most needs is realizing what good conduct means -- understand what is correct and what is grossly wrong, appriciate that the skewed sense of ego, pride and honor is rubbish, derogatory, anti progressive, violent and simply WRONG. Other than this, what it needs next are skills which can help them earn their living -- carpentry, driving, sewing, music, dance, writing, farming, computers etc .. It is the harsh reality that text book education alone is not successful in making truly good and productive people.  

While we cannot address everything, I think we still can start somewhere. I had started taking weekly sessions with children and young adults in a slum close to where i stayed in Powai, where I used to engage in talking about conduct, women, cleanliness, religious coexistence and also engage in fun and games where boys and girls participated together and role reversal was played and enacted out.

It was very appalling to see how at first little boys thought its not important for women to excel in school and how they thought trousers should only be worn by boys and not girls and how there were games only meant for boys.. But after a few months, it was encouraging to find the same set of boys helping other girls with their class room work, playing cricket and celebrating birthdays together. It was wonderful to see how the lessons on conduct started being practiced when the boys complained 'Didi aaj isne mujhe gandi gaali di' and how the kids started taking a shower everyday and kept a check on their fellow friends sometimes informing me 'Pata hai didi aaj ye naali mein ghus gaya ball uthane ke liye'...

These are the signs of the changes we want to see in our community and our people. And I am sure, if I could start something like that, with help from friends, I am sure I will be able to continue these initiatives and not abandon it mid way because I am not strong enough to carry on by myself.

I need volunteers. To make a beginning, I need people in Delhi, Gurgaon, Noida, Kashmir, Mumbai and Bangalore who would be ready to take on this initiative of choosing a locality and working to better the place and the people. 

A small team of 8 people for every location. Just a couple of hours of your time over a weekend, that too just once a month is all it takes to run this initiative. We would roster responsibilities amongst the team and have days based on our availability and convenience. The initial plan is to engage in talks and weekly sessions in schools - Pvt. as well as government, our community, and village panchayats. There will be 2 people from the group who would jointly take 2-3 hr sessions every weekend. If we have 8 people in a team, each person just needs to contribute 3 hrs every month. By experience I would say that if you tell people you want to give a 'Bhashan' on good living and high thinking, no one will come. What you need to say is that you will provide help in teaching and enter into their community, gain their trust and silently and effectively pass on the message of compassionate coexistence. 

If I see fairly good participation, we will work on the specifics together and make this happen.  

I request you to pass this message around and lets form a group and systematically plan this. 

I will start myself, but unless I have participation from people who say 'they feel strongly about this', nothing significant can be achieved.

Please remember, that if you cant ACT, you should not even complain, since you are not helping anything.

PS: Please reply with your nomination in the comment section and the area you are comfortable to work. By the end of January, I will collate the nominations and work out a proper plan. You can refer to the FB link to this note here: http://www.facebook.com/notes/deepshikha-baisya/dont-just-talk-act/10151354161206049

This is a picture of some of the children I took sessions with in Powai.

A Christmas present ....

.... for this pretty little one!

Aoteaora - for a lovely friend..

Water colors

Vande Mataram

We have come a long way, we still have a longer way to go.. to be a nation representing honesty, justice, prosperity, unity and love. 

We have made mistakes, and we have to be the ones to correct them. Each one of us represent the world we want to be living in.

An ideal world would be where we could be people before being citizens. Lets act responsibly and free ourselves from the baggage of borders. That would be total independence!

This day I again remind myself that I am in debt to all the freedom fighters of India for this breath of freedom that I fill my heart and mind with.

'Freedom is not worth having if it does not connote freedom to err. - MK Gandhi'

A very happy independence day to all of us.

London 2012 - Get Ahead of the Games!

Since the time I moved into London, I have unwillingly and unknowingly brought into the countdown and excitement for the London 2012.

I remember seeing the counter put on Trafalgar Square and also on my company homepage which showed ‘X’ days to London 2012 daily till the day it actually started. The mayor of London addressing the travellers almost every day and encouraging people to ‘Get Ahead of The Games’, and our Business Continuity Departments making advance preparations of ensuring their employees make it to work wading thru the predicted sea of people and choked public transport!

Today is the 1^st real working day after the games have started, and I use one of the important lines of London tube (the Jubilee Line) and the DLR which connect to the core London 2012 areas with Central London, and quite surprisingly the city was less crowded than usual J .. Maybe people have been scared into making alternate plans – working from home or getting out of London all together!

In this post, I wanted to write about the Olympic opening ceremony, which will be talked about for several years, at least until the next Olympics.   

Danny Boyle was the main man behind the Opening ceremony, which was commendable and lovely in many ways, very British in its essence and feel.

The opening began with showing pre industrial revolution Britain where the main occupation was farming and animal husbandry. Traditionally dressed men and women were shown working on the fields with herds of cows, sheep and ducks grazing the green grass, Britain appeared to be like a picture from an Enid Blyton story -- it so wonderfully showed the romance of country life with splendid views, water mill, maypole dancing and all the brightly lit faces and energies. Then came in the industrial revolution and there stood tall smoke expelling chimneys and all the lovely greenness was quickly replaced by coal, and tar and steel. Am not sure if it was supposed to signify greater prosperity and happiness, but the feeling it had on me was very dark and stressful – people with grease on their faces and arms working hard on wheel pulleys and coal factories and smoke dispensing towers with '1900s English style' suited rich looking men walking around giving orders – to me it almost seemed like the era gone by was nicer and happier. Anyway, that’s my view, maybe because I am more of a country person than being a city girl..

Then came in other sequences portraying the pride of UK, the National Health Services (NHS).. the sequence only focussed on comforting children in distress.. as if no one, but children, fall sick.. *giggles* .. Naah, without being too critical, it was nice to highlight the NHS, irrespective of the fact that it is really not the loveliest health services – but then again it is free of charge and functional in its own way, and I, coming from India, should be the last person to complain about it. Characters from the famous children books, Voldemort, Peter Pan etc were brought in during the NHS show which highlighted the British contribution to world children’s books. Post this was a rather silly ‘text’ based romantic story brought in with dance and music.. Did not quite get the purpose of that..

The best part of the games was undoubtedly the funny sequences by Mr. Bean and the wow factor brought in by the female drummer (Evelyn Glennie), Mr. Bond (Daniel Craig) and David Beckham, the felicitation of inventor of www, Sir Tem Berners Lee, the bringing in the torch, the fireworks and the lighting of the petals in the end.. J

Needless to say, the English were also tripping on the sportiness of Her Majesty to agree to act in a sequence and say ‘Hello Mr. Bond’ (or was it, ‘Good Evening, Mr. Bond’??) ..

You  know, it was a nicely done opening, however, I thought since this is Olympics which is existent because of world participation, it would have been nice if a host country could have the courage to get out of ‘self boast’, ‘self projection’ or ‘I, Me, Myself’ mode and do a unified show – especially a place like London, whose world supremacy does not need any further proof, and also because London in itself is a such a multi cultural and diverse place with people from all over the world sitting next to each other in any compartment of any tube.

There were many parts of the show which was only for the British eyes and sensibilities. But don’t all host countries do exactly that? They just don’t leave any opportunity to talk about themselves. London, alas, was no different.

Nevertheless, a good show which certainly will be talked about in many years to come.